Too Late To Stop The Clock

I think of a word:

My thoughts enter ‘free-flow’ – here goes: one thousand words or thirty minutes. See you on the other side:

I’m beginning to suspect the future has more influence on my actions: 

Not in the way many inspirational thinkers suggest. Their idea that the Universe provides anything a man sets his mind to possess; seems flawed to me. The child dying of hunger and thirst screams out for food and water is chosen as an example: Does the Universe listen? No Bob: the big dark vacuum has closed ears to the horrors of poverty.

For the last decade: my thoughts are most often focussed in the present moment. Tapping keys today causes ripples tomorrow. Images recorded today, memorise tomorrow. Off the cuff comments break thin glass friendship. Small offerings of kindness become welded with love and respect. 

The wisdom of time changes perspective: 

Today the torch of awareness shines toward the possibilities of the future. Not in the way of seeing an object which becomes a desire. I shine the light on words in my mind. Happiness, health, security, maybe wealth. As I think about the words, the possibilities and methods of achieving their meaning arise within my imagination. 

I suspect considering words has more potential for realising one’s ambitions than wishing for an object. I will think about the word wealth:

Some will associate the word wealth with money. Money is nothing, earning money is easy, using the money to best advantage is difficult. Some believe cash is a gauge of success. In reality, the excess of cash is a gauge of understanding the use of a commodity. 

I know a man who is rich and has a simple job; he is also mean. I know of another who believes he is rich and intelligent; the story is he is a dealer, everyone knows where his money is earned. Arrogance is evidence of his illusion; he fools no one. Fickle failure dabbling in the degradation of people. He has no wealth; he is non-human.

Wealth is getting life wrong; it is a catalogue of mistakes a lifetime long. It is buying a child a Halloween present and laughing at ghosts and spooks and wizards and witches. Wealth is the ability to make a junk shop guitar sound like Rodriguez Model FF. Wealth is the ability to guide a man out of debt, not loan him money and enter debt oneself.

I think about the word security:

Security is living within one’s means. It is working for the daily crust. Loving ones work, even though setting the alarm early is the beginning of the day. And sleep the second the head touches the pillow is the result of one’s toils. Security is a house one can afford. Security is not being impressed by another’s accumulation. Security is being without fear. Security is knowing the reality of one’s thoughts. 

A woman once believed she entered my head: She suggested my written words were a deception: I saw her fear, her insecurity. I do not doubt my words; there is no need for me to make excuses. If I say or write something, I am secure and without fear. To comment my work is flawed is the perception of the critic. In my security, I do not doubt my integrity.

My moral compass spins. There is no need to be politically correct. 

To my mind, the minority is the bomber, the bigot, the wrong-doer. These are minorities who should be exposed. To me the drug dealer, the drug grower, the pimp, bully, thug, racist, and bigot are all in the same sewer, they taint society with the smell of lies and deception. Their crimes cost the hard working taxpayer millions. When caught they should forfeit all they own to pay for their imprisonment. So; you do not like this? That’s fine by me, wait until you have you home ruined and destroyed by an addict. Wait until four racist hags beat your friend on a tram. Wait until your child is run down by a doped out dumb – dumb. 

The grower, the supplier, are dumb dumbs who supply the dope that twists the minds of those who defile your home, rapes your daughter, kills the child on his way home from school. 

Dumb – Dumbs?  Yes, they are stupid and ignorant. Not geniuses who bathe in the wealth of their trade. Stupid people are unaware of the reality of their acts. Their ignorance is most often smoked-screened in arrogance and sometimes perceived intelligence. The truth is they flaunt the rules of society and are stupid to believe they are nothing other than scum.

These are the minority I do not wish to understand. My choice is to brand them for who and what they are: what are they? None humans who ruin the lives of the innocent. What? Do you not think they affect you? Well: my unknown friend: your taxes pay for the police force. The judicial system, and prisons which punish them for their crimes. I wish for them to be seen for what they are, I am secure in my mind. There is no doubt the growers, dealers and their trade are the seeds of many crimes, deaths and tragedies.

I think of the word health:

Physical health I understand. I have enjoyed being fit, enjoyed the freedom of health. I miss the pleasure of the feeling of health. I neglect my body. The possibility is there will be a price to pay. And I was a hypocrite because I organise and promote shows which are focussed on becoming a Well Being. With this in mind, I have changed my thoughts to tomorrow and the future. I have taken steps to move into health and become a Well Being. In twelve months time, I will be five stones lighter and bicycle fit. I am secure in the wealth of this knowledge.

The dog of depression once infiltrated my mental health. It is a disease of the mind which cannot be portrayed. The howling jackal is unique to each victim. We know what it is, how it feels, its effects. Truth to tell, the victim of the tearing teeth does not know the ‘why’ of the disease. You see; if the ‘why’ were identified, the ‘how’ to silence the dog would be recognised. Notice I write ‘was once infiltrated’:  depression no longer concerns me, it cannot sink its fangs into my existence, you see, reality and strength and courage and confidence quell its potential to destroy life hours.

The seed word was Depression: It has taken me on a journey of enlightenment.

See You Soon